I pray the same thing every day. Please show me my mistakes. I am sorry for them. Thank you for your blessing, Lord. May your will be mine. Your law, mine. And I want to help you put it into practice. This is a habit that becomes alignment. Renewed every morning. Someone asked me: If his will stands above yours — do you doubt? No. I hope it overwrites mine. Completely. Piece by piece. ...
Yesterday I helped a family bury their dog. We accompanied him to his last breath. A dear, dear fighter — for those he loved. I read Psalm 23 to the family — so they could see: even this dark valley passes. In the evening I thought: now I will do something good for myself. I went out to celebrate. Into bed at six in the morning, fell straight asleep. Up again at two in the afternoon. The day was depressive. ...
It was a hard day. Someone I love was transferred to a more intensive psychiatric ward. I was there. There was trust. That is enough to say. The Scene At a door. My hand. A sentence, quietly: “They will do you good.” Trust had found a way through the storm. What I felt in that moment: love. Simple. Complete. Fear too, yes — but the courage was greater. And the courage came from the fear that someone would experience what I had to experience. ...
Today I ended the contact. Not out of anger. Because it had to be — for her and her new partner, and for me. It hurts. The time with her was beautiful. Head and Heart The head knows what it is doing. The heart loves unconditionally. Two different things entirely. Three years of relationship. Three years of friendship after that. And now: silence. Hosea Hosea married a woman who would betray him. He knew it. He did it anyway. Later he bought her back — fifteen pieces of silver and some barley. ...
It began with a question about Satan. But actually it was always something else. Freedom I believe in a God who wants real freedom. Not a simulation — but freedom built into creation itself, even when we use it against him. For me, Satan is proof that this is meant seriously. Whoever can fall is truly free. Imago Dei Created in his image. That is not a goal — it is the starting point. ...
A blog by an Austrian fool who crosses boundaries in every sense — in thinking, in writing, in faith. Nothing is too set in stone to be reconsidered. I have been programming publicly for over 24 years. Parts of that work can be found online at @jochumdev and @r3j0. I am a Highly Sensitive Person — once, especially as a child and young adult, a curse; today a gift. I worked in social services in IT — in various roles, over many years. Since 2011 I have also been a client (Bipolar 1 and non-substance addiction). What I have experienced on both sides shapes how I think and write. ...